When I wrote my first blog 6 months ago, one of my friend commented-‘Not everybody can give wings to their imagination as you have done’. After all these months, I am realizing the meaning of those words. I haven’t scribbled a word for my blog after the initial two posts. I go blank while I open my face book or twitter. I have gone without any status & tweets for a long time. I have lost interest in most of the things that at other times would be considered interesting. Sometimes I feel-Have I become senseless? Have I stopped thinking? Have I lost my creativity? It’s not that I was a creative guy sometime ago & everything vanished all of sudden. But thoughts used to swirl around my head so often. I really used to miss the turbulent state of my mind that made me scribble something.
When we are happy, we forget this world & find ourselves at the centre of dais with tiny people around. We love our life. When we are sad, we remember the world and find ourselves lonely among a number of strange people. We want to live other’s life. On both occasions we give prominence to ourselves. We know it, we realize that it’s the main cause of trouble but there are very few people who have control over it. I know I don’t belong to this group of strong people. I too, want to let go this thing called ‘me’. But, somehow I have failed. It’s my cause of trouble. It makes me ‘too happy’ and turns me ‘too sad’. Happiness, sadness, anger, excitement are a part of our life but the extremities of them makes our life bitter.
Life had been a bed of roses and suddenly the bed appeared to be thorny. A series of failures, headaches & heartaches & I couldn’t resist. Then came some success & I couldn’t resist again. I forgot the world. I gave prominence to oneself. If I ask why me during my failure, I must learn to ask the same during my success. I must accept the existence of people at both the times. This will help me lessen the extremities & turbulence of my mind.
Now, I am not sure where this blog is heading for. I don’t exactly know what I want to write. It’s written in a state of turbulence. But, somehow I am happy with it. I scribbled something.